Ephesians 4:27

2/1/13

      The past few days have all ran together. Ever since we arrived in Houston on Monday night we've been going non stop. We're trying to get everything in order for our new life out here and things set up for me to begin my treatments. At first I was doing pretty well, but sometime around Wednesday night I really started breaking down. That attitude rolled into most of the day Thursday, except when Dad and our cousin Jon finally arrived in Katy with all of our stuff and I was too busy unpacking to stop and worry. I was allowing the devil to use every little thing possible to tear me down and take my focus off of the positives and most importantly the fact that God is still in control. The devil wants to creep in my mind and make me forget that God has the power to heal me and that the Lord will give me the strength I need to get through this situation. I do not have to fight this alone, but Satan is fully aware of that, and that makes him all the more determined to try and weaken me by filling my head with negative thoughts. I am determined not to fall into his trap! In my situation I know it's okay to have a breakdown every once in a while or to cry myself to sleep, like I did on Wednesday night, but that was the first time that has ever happened since being diagnosed with cancer. I'm not trying to give myself a pat on the back or boast in myself in any way, but I think that the devil sees how I am trying so hard to stay close to the Lord through all of this and how I am depending on Him to get me through this trial and that is driving him crazy! So now he's trying extra hard to tear me down, to pull me away from God, by pointing out the negative aspects of this situation. I just have to keep this in mind because I refuse to let him win! The bible says:

"Do not give the devil a way to defeat you." -Ephesians 4:27

I have to keep my faith and trust in the Lord and shake off those negative thoughts. God is always in control!